9Marks
To be a faithful steward of your children you must abide in Christ (John 15:5).
Trickle-down theory: Mom’s daily devotions naturally trickle down to encouragement and instruction in the Lord for the children.
Not listening to your children causes you to misjudge them (James 1:19-20).
Our task list is not as important as our children’s thought life.
Preach the gospel of grace, not self-discipline.
Being parented is defining; parenting is refining.
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The one sentence answer is that parents should avoid wrongly provoking their children: “Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged” (Col. 3:21). Again, “Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord” (Eph. 6:4).
Here are ten ways to wrongly provoke your children:
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Sunday morning struggles. It seems that Satan often comes into our homes on Sunday mornings in order to make the Lord's Day a day of struggle. So pray, rise early, and be patient.
Pressure from other people (other church members, Christian grandparents, etc.) to baptize your children. Resist such outward pressure. Instead, look for and test for a credible profession of faith in your child (Prov. 22:15).
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In short, “the therapeutic” borrows a wonderful metaphor from medicine—“healing”—but reduces counseling problems to one aspect of a more complicated problem. Just as doctors aim to heal people, counselors speak of counseling in the same terms. But the problems which enter the counseling office are more complicated than that, involving not just the physical aspects of a person, but the mental, emotional, and spiritual. More importantly, the spiritual is always primary.
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Church-based counseling places the counseling process into the context of leaders and people who are already responsible before God to watch over your soul. If you have a choice between (i) seeing someone who knows nothing about you and has no obligation to you outside of counseling or (ii) seeing someone who will give an account to God for how well he has watched over your soul (e.g. Heb. 13:17), who would you choose?
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It’s more community-driven than individualistic. Most Christian counseling is purely individualistic. One counselor counsels one counselee. Most Christian counselors talk about relationships but remain wholly disconnected from the other person’s life apart from scheduled, one-on-one meetings in the counselor’s office. On the other hand, church-based counseling is a team effort (Prov. 11:14, 21:26).
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Church-based counseling is an attempt to draw “counseling” into the general discipling work of the local church. It’s practicing counseling by equipping members and leaders to meet one another’s counseling needs rather than referring people “out” to experts.
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Church should not primarily view discipleship as special event or a flashy program. Discipleship is not something that’s occasional or out of the ordinary, something that can be sealed off from the rest of our Christian lives. To be a Christian is to be a disciple of Christ. And being a disciple of Christ means
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Join a church.
Arrive early at church gatherings and stay late.
Practice hospitality with members of your church.
Ask God for strategic friendships.
If possible, include a line-item in your family or pastoral budget for weekly time with fellow Christians. Discuss this matter with your spouse. If possible, provide such a budget line for your spouse as well.
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Discipleship works most essentially through instruction and imitation. Discipleship works best through love. As we lovingly instruct younger believers in the way of godliness and live commendable lives, they grow in Christlikeness by imitating our life and doctrine (see 1 Tim. 4:16).
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Of course! The goal of the musical aspect of worship is to glorify God by praising him for who he is and what he’s done. Different styles of music will highlight different facets of God’s revelation. The same thing goes for songs from different eras in history and nations around the world.
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Teach about the importance of congregational singing as opportunity arises. This doesn’t have to be restricted to passages such as Ephesians 5:18-19, Colossians 3:16, and Romans 15:6, which explicitly mention congregational singing. A pastor can also rightly address congregational singing in passages that speak about unity, worship, or building one another up in the faith, because congregational singing relates to all of those broader biblical themes.
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If church leaders want to develop and emphasize congregational singing, they should strive for musical accompaniment that is mere and enhancing, rather than full and enveloping.
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It’s biblical. The New Testament commands Christians to sing together, even to address one another in song (Eph. 5:19; Col. 3:16).
It’s neglected. In many churches, the music can actually discourage singing, whether because so much of it is performed, or the accompaniment is so loud, or the music is hard to sing. We emphasize congregational singing because so many churches seem to neglect it.
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Performance music can focus our attention on the performers, or even on the music, rather than God.
